Weekend: Day 26 and Day 27

Oh boy! My power nap lasted for 13 hours and 30 minutes :) I can't believe I actually went to bed at 8 pm!


It was a really nice weekend.
The funny part is, I never went out this weekend, like, to a club or a pub... Which, let me tell you, is very unlikely for myself! It led me to a conclusion: I may as well have had a routine in life that I wasn't aware of until this very moment. Every Friday and every Saturday night I would be out partying with very rear exceptions. 


...No, actually the funny part is I enjoyed not going out!
The main reason I did is because I was too tired, physically and psychologically, that all I needed was the tranquility of my own room, offline-ness, a blanket and a good movie. Just time to be. I wanted it to be relaxing, and I used most of my time for good stuff, like books and movies and small talk. :)


And still, full two days were not enough time to rest. Which means, with this arrangement, I do not have enough time to rest.


In the context of stages of recharging I was mentioning last weekend, I'd like to present how I see them before I continue with further analysis.

• Getting Some Sleep - obviously, this is where you rest physically, in the first place, and make up for all the missing hours of sleep or just sleep in. However, it is not enough, because sleep is just unconscious pause of thoughts. There is a very important conscious part of resting.
• Acknowledging the current state of mind - without having to think of the future or daily tasks, this is when you take time to contemplate over (recent) past and how changes that happened then affected you. It's just "digesting" inner and outer happenings and realizing how you actually feel (may sound silly, but constantly being busy with thinking about all the current stuff without chance to reflect really requires this stage). I like to think of this stage as time for putting yourself back into balance or, in more spiritual words, coming back to yourself.
• Living it - there then just needs to be a time when you will just be who you are in that very moment. Without contemplating, thinking hard or, God forbid, planning! This stage is when you actually mentally rest the most. That is when "recreation" happens. When the energy is accumulating.
• What next? - ...then you make conclusions, decisions and plans on what it is that you want for yourself further on.

Of course, this doesn't necessarily have to be the chronology, stages can be on simultaneously, or ransacked, or in several cycles each considering different part of your life...

Without having this kind of consciousness, we risk to lose ourselves in the world that surrounds us. There is so much influence from the outer world we are exposed to, we all tend to bend and lose focus on what really matters to us. We can easily lose who we are and what our true desires are pointed at.

There is pressure from people we interact with as they all, led with their own understandings and needs, expect us to be someone and do something, even in the best intentions.

Circumstances we live under change daily. If we consider every new day as a new little victory, than we are fighting something each new day and that is - new challenges we are facing and overcoming. Well, each little fight changes you and changes where you’re at (that is the reason why you’re fighting, isn’t it?).

And, of course, media (meaning all you hear, see and read, be it Internet, newspaper, books, TV, radio…). That’s where we get information from and what is the basis of our opinions…

Because of all of this, it is very important to actively reassess our thoughts, feelings and wishes so that we could remain in harmony with ourselves and still serve others.

Especially if we're busy, we don't have time to do all of this and to remain close to ourselves, and the bottom line - creative.

It may seem complex, but that's what I believe most of us are really going through; the matter is only if we're aware of it.

Some people do it on a very organic level without ever thinking about thinking about it - just simply by following their instincts and without the ability to act any differently!  

But in my personal experience, and as I've seen in others, you need to fight for it, and fight hard to reach what your dreams are. To be brave to look them in the eyes and accord with, regardless what the surroundings expects from you. (When talking about this, I always think of an extreme but very simple example: Imagine you've, in your late years, discovered that you are homosexual. It's hard to accept that news and share it with the others, but that is what you want and who you are.)

Also, there are those who never ask themselves these questions and, in my so-far observation, are a majority of people. This group is the most "threatened" - let me call it that name - to achieve genuine happiness. Sounds cruel, but my honest assurance is that people really need to live their own dreams and not dreams or expectations of others, weather it be imposed or oblivious. And, to live your dreams you need to be cognizant of them.

Of course, there are people who are brought to this world to live a simple life, beginning to the end, without ever wanting more than what's meant for them to live. Although, I believe that in each and every one of us lies an extraordinary and unique personality unlike any other, that can fulfill itself to the fullest. But, realistically speaking, it owes a lot to the nurture, somewhat education and finally, plain possibilities and opportunities given.

Others, like myself, are analytical and put it all in list and categories and schemes. :)

  

Finally, there is group of people that is all this and in between, I suppose...

I think this weekend I got as far as acknowledging my current state of mind, and, forced with the lack of time, I made some future plans, but I obviously missed the most important part for continuing on, which is accumulating solid energy. Not only I could've had more rest in all existing forms, but I dislike making any plans without contemplating enough. And also, I haven't had time to think of all I wanted to think about.


With the hope in forthcoming week to be winning,
Rock on!